Friday, July 2, 2010

To Err is Human - So is Divorce

As much as we would like to deny it we are not perfect.  Well at least some of you are not perfect.  And that is the main reason erasers were invented.
Okay before the younger readers, if there are any complain let me explain.  Erasers were smallish pieces of rubber attached to the end of pencils.  You could remove words you did not mean to write by rubbing them with the eraser and voila, they were gone.  Well almost gone because they were never perfect and there was always this annoying telltale shadow known as an erasure left behind that showed the world you had made a mistake. 
Of course the entire above noted procedure has been replaced by the delete button, which leaves no visible residue and which I used several times during the typing of this sentence.
But the main point is that we as human beings do make mistakes.  Finding and correcting our mistakes can be a full time job.
Imagine that a doctor treating a patient for a troublesome disease finds out the medication he prescribed is not working.  Should he continue using it or admit an error and try something else?
The same is true of Government.  A good system allows for the correction of old outdated rules or laws and must go with the flow of evolution.  (I probably just lost a whole bunch of people on the ‘right’ with that word!)
Our Constitution has provisions for amendments and all municipalities realize that the law must never be stagnant.  It is a living breathing dynamic entity that must be kept healthy to survive.
Many of our laws were written hundreds of years ago and have been revised.  Others that should have been altered or removed are just not enforced.  For example it is against the law to feed the pigeons in New York City.   I won’t get into the debate about that here but are we really going to put someone in one of our overcrowded jails for tossing a breadcrumb on the ground?  Okay the birds are filthy and disgusting - Wait - I said no debate here so stop it!  Okay.
So by admitting that we mistakes and then correcting them we show ourselves to be intelligent.  We can adapt to changes in our lives.
Institutions that are rigidly stuck in the past will find themselves under attack from within as well as without.  This week New York State is joining many other states by passing a so-called no fault divorce law.  The law is aimed at allowing an easier path for women, or men to get out of abusive relationships.
Again I will not debate the pros and cons of the ruling except to say it is a step in the right direction.  I say this mainly because it seems to work for all parties involved and even lawyers, who admittedly make a bit of money on divorces seem to like it as well.
Unfortunately there is one group in the ‘anti’ column.  The Church which for some reason continues to ignore that whole ‘separation’ thingy is dead set against the new law as it, “Sends the wrong message regarding marriage,” and makes it seem somehow disposable (sic.)
They say that to err is human but to forgive divine!  I guess the Church forgot the divine part. (And to some divorce is divine.  I'm just sayin')
But with any life changing decision it is never reached without much internal angst.  Divorce, like marriage should not be entered into lightly.  And I believe most people, Hollywood celebrity types excluded, feel the same way.  Marriage is not for everyone.  But when a marriage becomes diseased and all other medications have been tried it may become necessary for the ultimate cure rather than allow it to sit and fester.
Divorce will never be a ‘delete button’ solution to a failed marriage.  It may allow a clean slate start but the annoying shadow will always remain.

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