Saturday, January 23, 2010

The Corporation and the Mohel

A traditional rite of passage in the Jewish religion is the Bar Mitzvah.

A male becomes Bar Mitzvah (females are Bas or Bat Mitzvahed) on the 13th birthday in part by reciting his Haftorah and reading from the Torah as part of a minyon. After fulfilling the full spectrum of requirements he triumphantly turns to the congregation and proudly announces, "Today I am a man!" This is usually followed by a great party.

As with all religious rituals it is well known within its own community but elsewhere - not so much.

This week the honor of saying the words all Jewish 12 year olds cannot wait to say was given to a much larger group by our nation's highest court.

In a stunning 5 to 4 decision the Supreme Court bestowed upon all corporations the same rights as 13 year old Jews. From now on they are to be considered men with all the rights of an individual!

The great celebration that followed this ruling must have been tremendous. I'll bet that upon hearing the news Vikram Pandit and many other CEOs of large corporations resoundly shouted, Mazel Tov!

Terror Wins 5 to 4

There is an old joke in the form of a question-answer duo that comes to mind every once in a while:
What does a SADIST do to a MASOCHIST?

The not so funny joke illustrates one of our deepest fears, the inability to have control over our own situation. This lack of control is also known as frustration.

And this is not a new concept but one that dates back to the ancient Greeks and the story of Tantalus.

Lack of personal control is also at the heart of our penal system's form of punishment. Aside from being incarcerated for a crime against society a convicted criminal loses any and all say in his (or her) day to day routine. They are under the control of others and
must do as told. Failure to do so will result in even further loss of rights.

Another great fear that has become more prevalent in the world today is that of terrorism.

We may not think of it every second but it lurks in the backs of our minds nevertheless. We encounter the signs at airports and all places where crowds gather.

But this week a different form of terrorist came into prominence. And this one may prove to be more insidious than all others before him for he has the power to control our lives for years to come. And he can do so with his
swift severe sword-like pen!

I am speaking of Chief Justice John Roberts of the United States Supreme Court.

Say what you will about Bush the bumbling buffoon and sometime puppet of Dick Cheney but he left the country lamenting a lasting legacy of legislative larceny when he appointed young Roberts to his lifetime post in 2005.

This week Mr. Roberts (I apologize but I cannot use the words Justice and Roberts together anymore) struck down a law
and in essence opened the floodgates for corporate control of America.

By allowing 'big business' to spend as much
money as they wish on campaign advertising etc. they have set the nation on a terrible course. These entities will be able to mold public opinion by bombarding the airways with professionally produced propaganda.

For example, let's assume one of the richest corporations in the world decides to promote themselves as the anti-establishment savior of the masses. How long before the CEO of Exxon is crowned President?

Sounds ridiculous?
Perhaps, but who would have ever thought W would be elected TWICE?

(When we were young we were told that anyone could grow up to be President. Unfortunately that became true. But I digress.)

The current make-up of the 'above the law' court is guaranteed to take away more of our individual identities and liberties than any Homeland Security edict put in place by the Gestapo-like Cheney Death Panel from 2000 to 2008.

By allowing Bush a second term (Some still believe he never actually won the first time) we sealed our fate for decades to come. What terrorist could match what we have done to ourselves over the last decade?

I say the clearest way for the sadistic Osama Bin Laden and his ilk to harm the masochists of America would be to do nothing!

Friday, January 22, 2010

Dream On America

Teddy Kennedy always said the dream will go on. And this week proved him to be prophetic! The dream will go on! And on and on and on. That's because it will never be anything but a dream!

So let's get things straight.

After Wall Street finally starting to return to a higher value and thus allow those of us who control nothing to gain back some of our lost 401K value Obama decided to talk tough.

Wall Street decided to get back at him and the rest of us by taking their profits out before we had a chance to fart thus sending our 401Ks back down to December levels.

The nice people of Massachusetts decided that Brown, the scumbag Republican was going to block any and all forms of Health Care reform for the rest of the country and since they already have what the rest of the country wants thereby saving themselves some money at our expense. I can't argue with their logic only their humanity. I hope the rest of the country remembers their kindness the next chance we get to repay them.

As for Ms. Coakley - She is an asshole. If you need an explanation you are not alive.

So unemployment continues to rise as the Insurance companies continue to screw the country.

The Democrats have lost any semblance of objects in their collective scrotum and the President is vowing to fight!

WTF was he doing up until now? I guess by his own words - NOTHING!

And speaking of nothing, that's what the Republicans have done for America ever since they lost power. And like that child of which I spoke of in an earlier post they will continue to do nothing until they get control back. And I guess at that time they will pass legislation outlawing profits for anyone not Republican. (Correction - It has been pointed out to me by a Twitterati friend that the Republicans have in fact done many things since losing the majority in Congress. I apologize for the oversight. The problem is most if not all the things they did hurt normal humans. I hope this clears things up.)


A tremendous amount of Middle class America:

Has no job;
Has no worthwhile health care;
Has no retirement money to speak of;
Has very few prospects; and
Has no hope of a Government OF - BY - and FOR THEM!

The last line is of course not true if you are a corporation. For you Mr. John Roberts and his merry band of ANTI-ROBIN HOODS will continue to do what they can to rob from the poor to give to the rich. The trio of Roberts - Scalia & Long Dong Silver have seen to it that their friends will be taken care of. (Make that a quartet as scumbag filth Alito has added himself into the mix with his sneer and "Not True" statement to the President. If ever there were four candidates for waterboarding...)

The American Dream?
America - Land of dreams for the wealthy
America - Land of nightmares for all others.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Limericks For Our Time

There once was a Pres named Obama
Who suffered a terrible trauma
He succumbed to a blow
From the Party of No
The country is doomed - Oh Mama!

Our country is stuck in the mud
The president's just a big dud
He hoped for a real
Bipartisan deal
Instead what he got was just crud!

A Couple of Side Issues

Most active political watchers already know the following but...

Today it was announced that the George W Bush - Dick (F U America) Cheney think tank formerly known as the U S Supreme Court has ruled that corporations can use unlimited amounts of money to campaign for the puppet, I mean Politician of their choice.

The vote was mind blowing NOT at 5 to 4.

It really should not matter what large corporations want because we the people should vote the way we wish, right?

This is reality Greg!

Most Americans are sheep getting their feed from Fox and the like. A well turned phrase delivered with sound-bite quickness will get more favorable votes than the knowledge that the candidate is a convicted criminal!

Don't get me wrong, our Congressmen are not convicted criminals - Yet!

Look for more infomercials and full length videos produced by large corporations all aimed at your mind and your vote.

Think SPAM was awful?

But while the Supremes were getting their way our House Homeland Security Committee was busy earning their pay listening to the Bimbo Michaele Salahi and her useless husband Tareq recite those wonderful words from the Fifth Amendment.

After refusing to answer any questions one can only hope that the two poster children for the White Trash community will slink back to a trailer somewhere and mingle with their betters.

I'm Not Listening - So There!

When children do not want to do what they are supposed to do they cover their ears and make sounds to block out their parents. In their minds the bad things will go away if they wait long enough. In this way one child may even disrupt an entire classroom.

Unfortunately if this one bad apple syndrome persists and is reinforced by success it could lead to irrational behavior in later life. This is what we are experiencing in our Congress these days.

Republicans both individually and en masse have an agenda not unlike that unruly child. Unfortunately they are not just trying to get out of doing the dishes. Their ‘deaf ear’ policy is aimed at doing nothing, at least not until they are back in power.

For example, decorated counterterrorism expert Errol Southers has just withdrawn his name from consideration as the new head of the woefully understaffed TSA. He was President Obama’s top choice and a deserving one at that.

Did he do this because he is not qualified?

Most certainly not!

Was he afraid of skeletons in his closet?

I doubt it.

He pulled out because one man (and I use the term loosely) didn’t like him. Or more to the point did not want any change in they way things are being done if it means giving President Obama a victory.

Disgraceful disgusting DeMint, Republican Senator from the wonderful state that gave us the Appalachian Trail - Brazil connection has stated that he is afraid Mr. Southers will attempt to allow the TSA baggage handlers to have collective bargaining rights.


Was that the real reason?

You will not get a real answer from the South Carolinian because its hard to hear with your fingers in your ears.

So DeMint wins and we the people lose.

So where is the outcry over this one one-hundredth Senator being able to stop an appointment? Using the child analogy once more we see the ‘Bully Syndrome.’

Bullies were never in the majority. They got their way by bluster and bullshit and big mouthed insults aimed at those they hated or rather feared for no real reason. Weak minded followers did so for fear of being in the path of wrath if they did not.

The voters of this country were sick of the Bush Cheney administration and their bullying tactics. We voted them and many of their followers out of office last year. We hoped the Democratic majority would do the right thing.

Most people on ‘Main Street’ hated and still hate the fact that the fat cats of Wall Street and the CEOs of bailed out banks are paying themselves huge bonuses. This money basically came from tax payer dollars used to stop the failures they themselves caused!

Most Americans wanted and still want fair reform on health care insurance. And by fair I mean insurance that allows individuals to get affordable competitive non-biased professional health care without having to beg an accountant for approval.

However in the year that followed the bully purge the surge has died out. Disappointment in the wussies of the Democrat Party and their lack of a united team mentality has turn off many former supporters.

The polls are showing these Democratic and Independent rebels to be abandoning the Democrats and turning back toward the dark side and Darth Vader. There is talk that come November the Republicans could even take back control of Congress.

If that happens the Empire will surely strike back! Forget the “Death Panels” and fear the “Death Star!”

Because the same men vying for seats in congress are the puppets of big business; big insurance; and any lobby with big deep pockets. They are the bullies of our childhood.

And when the bullies get their way and finally take their fingers out of their ears look out!

Be careful what you wish for America!

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Are you all Right? S'awriiiiight!

Senor Wences used to say, “For you is e z, for me is difficult.” That is always true as long as you have the luxury of time on your side and can choose the ‘you’ you are talking about.

In politics time is not much of an obstacle. It is a relative thing. As a whole our political parties actually have all the time in the world, or so it seems. It is only individually that they are on the clock.

The public may feel that their Senators or Representatives are in a hurry to get things done so that they can help their constituents and get reelected but truth be told they are interested only in the ‘easy.’

Now don’t confuse that with the ‘Big Easy’ because as was famously shown in 2005 the Big Easy is not very much on the minds of every pol.

Politics used to be called the art of the possible but getting things done in DC is no longer that EZ.

Last year the public sent a message to the leaders in Washington that we wanted something done about the economy and health care and jobs and the list goes on.

We were hoping that the fat cats in the three parts of our government would understand our needs and desires.

But one side decided that being out of power didn’t necessarily mean being out of control. So they got together in smoke filled rooms and C Street bedrooms and Lobbies not generally found in apartment buildings and synchronized their clocks.

The plan was to wait out the Democrats and dam the flood of regulations that were aimed at curing our nation’s woes. ‘After all,’ they felt ‘if things get better while they are in power then we may have a hard time getting our friends elected.’

I cannot be sure those exact words were used but no one can deny the spirit was invoked.

One politician proudly claimed that stopping Obama and his health care initiative will prove to be his Waterloo.

And the new Senator from the former ‘Blue’ state of Massachusetts stated clearly that he will be the 41st vote and thus be able to stop the Democrats from doing anything.

Stop them?

From doing what?

What is it he thought they were going to do?

Wasn't he speaking about the gang that can't shoot straight?

The group that doesn’t have a clue?

Well you might argue that they were going to try and help the little guy on ‘Main Street’ but the ship has now sailed. It has sailed because even though they still hold the majority at 59 to 41 the way in which our Senate is structured that’s just not good enough! And frankly that works just fine for the Democrats who can now blame the obstructionist Republicans for anything bad that happens from here on in.

So we will continue to sit and wait and hope and pray for a miracle. And while we do time will march on and millions more will go broke and die. But the big businesses that own our congress and therefore America will survive.

And a new crop of politicians are honing their skills and practicing their ghost written speeches in front of mirrors reflecting their public faces.

And a new crop of lobbyists are setting their agenda and marking their calendars for November 3rd to meet these figure heads. They've got to be taught before it's too late...

They got their way and nothing will change.

We are not doomed but we are stagnant. Time is on their side, it is not on ours. Will we actually be better off in the long run? Will our children get jobs? Will they have better lives than we had?

For those in power the answer is easy – But for the rest of us, is difficult!

Monday, January 18, 2010

Israel - Damned if They Do ...

I was struck by a news report about the American hospital ship, the USS Comfort. It was being sent on a mercy mission to Haiti. It left and would arrive in 5 days. This was a wonderful thing.

But I then heard that an operational M*A*S*H unit was already treating hundreds of wounded Haitians in the field. So who could have gotten there already? How is it possible that another nation acted so swiftly and without fanfare?

Was this the work of Great Britain?
How about France?
Any European Nation?
No the quick response was courtesy of the hated Israelis!

Not one Arab nation lifted a caftan. Unfortunately this is not a surprise. Their leaders were probably calculating how much profit they would reap with the increased oil expenditures in the devastated island nation.

(After writing this I find that there has been some aid sent by a few Muslin countries but not yet from Saudi Arabia. You remember the Saudis, right? They're the wonderful country that brought you the majority of the 911 terrorists. W Bush made love to the leaders and walked hand in hand through our nation's Rose Garden with the Saudi Prince. With all their oil W & Cheney had to suckle at their pump for years.)

I do not know who originally wrote the following but it is right on.

But not to worry - The world will still hate the Israelis. After all what have they done for the rest of the world lately?


Many countries and world leaders have accused Israel of responding disproportionately to aggression from Hezbollah in Lebanon and Hamas in Gaza.

However, it is time that the world press and media speak of another disproportionate response from Israel.

The terrible disastrous earthquake in Haiti has generated responses from many nations. The US has sent supplies and personnel, Britain sent 64 firemen and 8 volunteers, France sent troops for Search and Rescue. Many large and wealthy nations of the world sent money.
The Arab and Muslim world nothing.

Israel, a nation of 7.5 million people has sent a team of 220 people that include Medical personnel and will establish the largest field hospital in Haiti, treating up to 5000 people a day, an experienced Search and Rescue team and medical supplies.

As in previous earthquake disasters, such as in Gujarat India in 2001 and in Turkey, in the bombings in Kenya, Israel has been one of the most generous givers of aid and assistance.

Turkey seems to have forgotten this help as its extreme Muslim Government is cozying up to Iran.

Judge Goldstone, where are you now? Eating your heart out and hanging your head down in shame I hope.

The favorite occupation in the UN is Israel bashing. More resolutions have been passed condemning Israel than all the so called democratic nations such as Sudan, China, Russia and others for their crimes against their minorities.

I think it is time that the world should know about Israel's disproportionate response.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Let's Get Ready To Rumbllllllle!

I just turned off the television after I heard the lead-in to the news program about to start this Sunday morning. The 'voice over' touted the guests as Democratic Governor of Vermont, Tim Kaine VERSUS RNC Chairman Michael Steele.

Forget the fact that the two will admittedly be squaring off against each other with views that are diametrically opposed the statement that it's one VS. the other is what gets me.

When did our leaders decide that it was better to seek the farthest corner of the ring and come out fighting every time they got together?

In the business world great companies need more than yes men to keep them moving forward. Not everything is an argument but discussions are better when all sides are examined. A good working conclusion is then made up from the aggregate of ideas.

But by the same token the yes men are necessary to move the final decisions ahead once the course is agreed upon. It is when that final course is not found that the company flounders.

And that is what has happened in Washington. Congress is floundering under the weight of an all powerful partisanship and a pervasive 'WE VERSUS THEY' mentality.

Continuing to act like boxing matches politics has turned into the pugilistic sport of verbal jabs and take downs.

This week it was revealed that Harry Reid used the word Negro in a speech from over a year ago. In this day and age it was a mistake but the furor it has unleashed is more interesting.

The Republicans and their spokesman Steele immediately seized upon this unfortunate utterance to further disrupt any chance of governance from the current administration.

One might think that Michael Steele was upset by Mr. Reid's use of the now politically incorrect word but I believe he was so elated at the chance to look outraged that he almost wet his pants.

Realizing the mistake made so long ago Harry Reid called the President and apologized and Mr. Obama accepted. He understood where the words came from and that the intent was not to demean an entire group of people but rather explain an under the surface emotion unfortunately shared across the country by many Americans - right or wrong.

But the episode once again sets DC politics off course. The Republican and Conservative minorities seeking only to disrupt cannot help but jab at Mr. Reid and take the conversation away from the issues of the day.

Their mission is not to get affordable health care for all American citizens; or to fix the broken financial structure of the country; or even to worry about the future of the climate and how it might affect our very existence. Their mission is to punch and jab and send a powerful uppercut into the Democratic Party's gut laying them out for the count so that they can once again be crowned victor.

But the fight between the parties will not end there. The Democrats who seem to have come late to the ring do finally realize it is a battle. It is a sport whose Holy Grail is the crown!

The Presidency and control of the two houses of Congress is the Super Bowl and the Stanley Cup of politics all rolled into one.

At the moment the Republican Party is the underdog but don't count them out. They have weathered scandal after scandal yet still stand and point their collective fingers at the other guys. The Democrats don't yet have the mentality to come in for the kill like their opponents do.

After all which is worse, using the word 'Negro' in a speech or disappearing from your spouse and constituents to hike the Appalachian Trail in South America? Having the audacity to try and wrench control of health care away from the greedy all-powerful blood-sucking insurance companies or insinuating that Obama wants to kill your grandma?!?

Clearly politics is a prize fight. Unfortunately the prize is out future and we lose no matter which side wins.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

A Winter's Lament - Reprinted

I think my nose is running
It's impossible to tell
You see it's frozen solid
And it cannot even smell.

My glasses are all fogged up
Just to see straight would be nice
My eyes are surely tearing
But my tears have turned to ice.

I know that I am moving
Just as sure as the North wind blows
There is no doubt about it
I just cannot feel my toes.

I scratch my head with fingers
That have long since fallen numb
To walk around on days like these
I really must be dumb.

I cannot wait 'til June comes
Ah the Summer will be sweet
Of course you know I'll then bemoan
The awful Summer heat!

(I originally wrote this in my head while walking and freezing on the streets of Manhattan many years ago.
I had just been laid off and was going to meet with a new company in the hopes of hooking up with them.
I survived the walk from Penn Station to the interview but just barely.
While I did not get that job I did get one a month later, when the weather was turning just a bit more human.
A friend of mine read this and sent it in to a local paper. They must have liked it because they printed it.
But the funny thing is they gave the 'By-Line' to a Bruce Research - adding 'ear' to my name for some reason. However since no royalties were involved it mattered not.
I hope you enjoy the poem.)

Friday, January 8, 2010

Hypocrisy from A to Z

Actually the title should be Hypocrisy from AZ since I am talking about AstraZeneca!

For months those of us who don't change the channel when commercials intrude on our lives have been witness to a tremendous series of ads from this pharmaceutical giant. At then end of each of these self-serving missives we are told that if we cannot pay for their product, "AstraZeneca may be able to help."

Aside from the fact that most of us have never heard of the drugs they speak of before the ad the best part of the spiel is the long list of possible side-effects. One such drug supposed to treat depression has as one of the known side-effects strange or scary dreams and suicide!

I don't know about you but I would rather be depressed than dead.

But the reason for this post is to point out a news item that appeared in the paper today (1-8-2010.) It was tucked away on the bottom of page 46 and was most likely only noticed by the most ardent of readers.

The article is about a little purple pill called Nexium and it is a gold mine for AZ.

You may click the above link to read the entire article but here are the basics:

1 AZ, who routinely offers to help those of us who cannot afford the ridiculously high price of drugs that could be bought outside the US for a fraction of the cost is willing to chip in occasionally to help some people pay for the product.

2 AZ will do everything in it's power to stop generic companies from offering the same drug at lower prices in the US.

3 AZ does not give a rat's ass about anything but their bottom line so the last words of all their TV ads IS A LIE!

As with everything involved in the hoax known as Health Care Reform in America companies such as AZ routinely fork over millions of dollars to keep the status quo.

The health care industry that includes Big Pharma has spent hundreds of millions of dollars rather than lower their prices. It may sound counter-intuitive but the money has been well spent. They are about to have their Congressional puppets mandate that everyone purchase insurance.

You may argue that they need the extra money for research and development but there should be a limit to their greed.

There is also a word for an organism that feeds of the host body to within an inch of its life knowing when to stop for fear of killing it. I used to think it was a parasite but I was wrong - from A to Z.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

I Have a DREAM!

This is basically an email that is going around the internet. I have changed very little. The message is clear and concise one and that is why it will never come to pass.

Too bad though, because it is, as Spock would say quite logical!

The message is entitled:

1. Term Limits: 12 years only, choose one of the possible options below.

A. Two Six year Senate terms
B. Six Two year House terms
C. One Six year Senate term and three Two Year House terms

Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, serve your term(s), then go home and back to work or as in the case of many of our current leaders START WORKING!

2. No Tenure / No Pension:

A congressman collects a salary while in office and receives no continuing pay when they leave office.
Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators. They serve their term(s), then go home and back to work or again as in the case of many of our current leaders START WORKING!

3. Congress (past, present & future) participates in Social Security: DUH!

All funds in the Congressional retirement fund moves to the Social Security system immediately.

All future funds flow into the Social Security system, Congress participates with the American people.
Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, server your term(s), then go home and back to work - you get the picture.

4. Congress can purchase their own retirement plan just as all Americans.
Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, serve your term(s), then go home and back to work...

5. Congress will no longer vote themselves a pay raise. Congressional pay will rise by the lower of CPI or 3%. It could include a pay cut as so many workers have had to accept this year!
Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, serve your term(s), then go home and back to work...

6. Congress loses their current health care system and participates in the same health care system as the American people. Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, serve your term(s), then go home and back to work...

7. Congress must equally abide by all laws they impose on the American people. (If nothing else this one will make their heads explode.)
Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, serve your term(s), then go home and back to work.

8. All contracts with past and present congressmen are void effective 1/1/2011.
The American people did not make this contract with congressmen. Congressmen made all these contracts for themselves.

Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, serve your term(s), then go home and back to work...

And one just added by Dan S. of Long Island:

9. Congressmen shall be banned for life from becoming formal or "informal"lobbyists-
Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, serve your term(s), then go home and back to work. In addition, the Founding Fathers envisioned the citizen legislators would serve their fellow citizens(their constituents) and not big corporations. (Thanks Dan - You are right!)

The message as I said earlier is clear. It truly is a no-brainer, which unfortunately also describes many of the members of Congress. I can say this because the ones I am hinting at do not seem to read actual bills before coming out against them, right Ms. Bachmann?

I am not smart enough to figure out a way to get the above on 50 ballots next year but if we could things would really change in America! And isn't that what the majority of us voted for last time?

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Special Combos

It used to be you could go to a ballpark and have a chance to see a complete game by the pitcher. Those days ended with the advent of the "Specialist."

Specialists who are supposedly geared to do but one thing and do it well have taken over the game. Fans now scour the sports pages for a 7th inning pitcher who is good with a runner on second and a Lefty at bat with a slight breeze from right field! (Rosters may have to be increased.)

Unfortunately the stupidity of baseball did not end there and the so-called art of the specialist has become mainstream. We have security experts on cable news and entertainment only reporters who specialize in dirt etc. on many other networks.

While specialists do have their place in our world, one that has operating rooms comes to mind, they should not be in every nook and cranny of our lives.

So I would like to propose a marriage of sorts where we can have specialists double up. One person can then speak about many topics for which that person is an authority. We can also have certain necessary functions of our lives combined to save time and effort.

So in this spirit I hereby make the following proposals:

1. Combine airport scanners with mammograms and prostate screenings.
(All are pains and some find them an invasion of privacy. Now women can get a quick check up on their way to a safe vacation! And the doctor's fingers can be saved for other uses. All could be covered by a trip insurance policy.)

2. Combine certain news programs with church revivals.
(Some commentators who say they are newsmen seem to be doing this already so just bring it out of the closet as it were, right Hume?)

3. Combine Hockey and Boxing.
(Wait, never mind - they already do!)

4. Make all Senators and Congressmen wear Nascar type suits so their affiliations are clear.
(This way we don't have to wait for the voting to know what bills will or won't pass.)

5. Have all our tax dollars go directly to corporations.
(This cuts out the middle men of DC and ensures our economy will be safe for years to come.)

And finally:

6. Combine food products much like NASA did back in the days of Tang!
(My son and his friends recently had 'Terducken' for dinner. It's a chicken inside a duck surrounded by turkey! I would have had a side of Pepcid but...)

For the sake of time and space I will end here. Please feel free to add your own combos.

Friday, January 1, 2010

All Purpose Resolution

Our resolutions of the past
....... Have just not gone too well
And things we change tend not to last
....... In fact they go to Hell

So here's my resolution now
....... I've thought and I have planned
No resolution will I allow
....... Success is well at hand!