Headlines Are Funny

Since headlines must grab your attention there is no way for them to be totally specific. The best and most effective ones seem to be those with multiple meanings. That makes for some enjoyable misinterpretations.

We all know how one letter can change a word but sometimes the changes are funny. Unfortunately they involve speaking the words so say them out loud for the full effect.

Here are some Newsday headings and their possible spoken misinterpretations:

Pols hopeful of MTA deal:

1 People of Poland hope that the MTA will not raise fares too high

2 A Gallop poll found more people want a lower fare by 60 to 40

3 Politicians think they can iron out a deal to pocket money and still keep the fares down.

Crackdown on bus drivers:

1 Too many people are becoming bus drivers. Lawmakers are stopping them

2 Bus drivers are slowing their usage of Crack

3 Some bus drivers are not obeying the law or do not have licenses

Clinton pushes for China role:

1 Hillary Clinton tries out for part in a new play about China

2 A hungry Clinton seeks tasty egg roll

3 Clinton backs Esther Rolles’ Asian cousin (Okay a bit far fetched)

4 The Secretary of State wants China involved in policy making

Blast in Brazil:

1 Spring break in Rio

2 The 2001 Tony winning group performs south of the equator

3 Explosion rocks city in South America