Sunday, October 24, 2010

A Few of My Scariest Things

Totally tongue in cheek response to toxic tactics on television today.
(With apologies to Julie Andrews & Maria Von Trapp)

Saris and corn rolls and dreadlocks and fat trolls
Slanted eyes, dark skin and models way too thin
Radio heavies on oxy or meth
These are the things that scare me half to death.

Gun wielding Texans with weapons that they hide
People from countries who drive on the wrong side
Asians and Muslims and people of faith
These are the things that scare me half to daith.

Witches and covens and tea party love-ins
Shushing librarians and scary libertarians
America’s future will now just limpeth
These are the things that scare me half to death.

When the news comes
And speaks of bums
We find in DC
I think of the people who are not like me
And from the real world I flee.


Socialist leaders without proofs of their birth
These things do not give me much joy or much mirth
Lisps that give speakers much worry and 'thtreth'
These are the things that scare me half to death.

Supreme court justices using their power
Making their women give in and or cower
Servicemen fighting until their last breath
These are the things that scare me half to death.

People who vote but do not have a clear clue
Their only thought is that they wish to screw you
Losing my health care and then all my teeth
These are the things that scare me half to death.

Killing grandma
With Sharia law
What is it all for?
I think of the people who are not like me
And from the real world I flee.

(This entire post is of course farce! It was written in response not only to current events such as the NPR firing of a latent Fox contributor who finally spoke his mind but also to the continuing 'scare tactics' of the Republicans who always try to scare to win.  I trust you realize it is meant only as comic relief but if not please leave a comment.  Oh yeah, the piece is meant to be sung!)

No comments: