Republican Music 2012

With one debate after another this season of the Republican Primary has turned into a mass of blurry BS sprinkled with hypocritical hogwash aimed at bamboozling enough un and under educated voters as possible.
Sadly it has worked so far as the candidates who have dropped out of the race are not much worse than the ones remaining.
None of us are without faults but most of us don't lie for a living. Well I just lost any trial lawyers who read my blog.
As human beings many if not all of us have trouble remembering all the facts.
But it is equally true that when long pieces of information or soliloquies are put to music or placed in pleasing rhyme schemes they may become, well, memorable.
I was never in a Shakespeare play nor did I commit any of his works to memory but I can recite the "tomorrow and tomorrow..." piece as well as anyone this side of Richard Burton and friends.
So for the aid and assistance of those of you who's eyes have blurred and ears are aching listening to the phony rhetoric spewing from both sides of the mouths of the Republican Presidential hopefuls I offer four simple poetic (I hope) explanations of their character.
In no special order I give you:

The Song of Romney


I know I was flawed as my bank account soared

But don't expect a straight answer!

I made money hand over fist
And you who have clawed
To pay your room and board
Are surely at me quite pissed


But vote for me now and I'll show you how
To make all your small dreams come true
And this I here vow
if my fortune you allow
Past the tax code unscathed to sneak through

Hey Abbot

Newt's Plaint


I know I was harsh on old Bill
When his Presidency I tried to kill
Sure I too had a fling
But I gave her a ring
And next time and again I will!

Let me think - NOT GOV'TS JOB!

Ron Paul Bearer's Wish


Like Humpty upon his great wall
Should any of our poor people fall
If bones they do break
To the hospital take
Their own money, not mine AT ALL!


And finally:

Please God No!

Notes from the Inner Santorum


A woman's body's her temple
To be worshipped and honored and such
And all must follow MY example
Before marriage you never may touch


As for fetus and zygote and sperm
Between Bible and life there's no chasm
Presidents must decide for their term
When and where you may have your orgasm!



I hope these little ditties make it easier for all voters when they pull that important lever come November.  America's future rests in their hand heaven help us!

First Do No, WHAT???

When Senator Ron Paul hinted that he and many if not all of his followers and supporters would do nothing to help a dying human who had no health insurance he elicited a favorable response from many in his camp.

He also elicited a hailstorm of anger from the left and released a huge number of comedic extrapolations; not the least of which came from the fertile minds at SNL where a Ron Paul-like candidate confirmed that he would not stop to save a bunch of cute crying puppies from a burning building.

“Hell no I wouldn’t. Government should not get involved in that type of thing.”

So Ron Paul, who is not only a Senator but a doctor as well has chosen to rewrite the title of one of his oaths changing the “a” to an “i” on the caduceus.

I would like to say that Mr. Paul had some correct thoughts. But as an 'uber' Libertarian he loses sight that he is also, or perhaps was once, a human being.

I understand the feeling of anger at anyone who games the system for personal gain and then calls ON the system for aid if he fails.

Hell we are still going through an economic disaster brought about by just that type of individual!  (Actually individuals and corporations etc. but that's for a different rant.)

However when an individual chooses to forgo health insurance he or she may be doing so for reasons other than personal gain.

It's not my job!

What Mr. Paul should have said was, “We should help the person and find out what the problem is and try to get that person back on track, and we should do so to the best of our abilities. But if we find out that the person chose not to pay for insurance so as to save money while being able to afford it then the entire bill must be paid and the person be held responsible for its payment.”

He could have further clarified by saying that if the man could not afford insurance because he was laid off from his job or went through some other catastrophic event we would work it out later, perhaps even with community service for the greater good.

But Mr. Paul chose not to go that route choosing his hard line "me and only me" mantra.

One wonders why a person such as Mr. Paul even wants to be in government since he obviously hates it so and wants it shrunk to the point of non-existence.  I guess he's a masochist of sorts.
I hereby state that from now the Senator's supporters must be renamed PAUL BEARERS!

The bottom line is that of all people a doctor should not be leaving a dying man on the side of the road to first go check out his financial statement. Or at least he should not be saying it!

That’s, ‘first do no harm,’ Senator not first checkout his bank account and motives!